I am a military veteran. I am strong, I am beautiful and I am more than capable. I am following my life long dream to rescue as many animals as possible, to be an advocate for earth and her well being. I am a home owner. I own five acres, and I have the dream job of working at a veterinary clinic. I meditate. I journal. I have lasting relationships that are very important to me. I make people laugh. I would dare to say I’ve even inspired a person or two in my lifetime. I hope to continue to do so. Sometimes I’m so incandescently happy that my life feels like a fairy tale. Other times I’m frustrated and angry, and say fuck…a lot. I am a complex creature of experience, emotions, faith, strength, wisdom, and hope…and I also have depression.
About a month ago I finally decided to talk to someone about my mental health. I told a very nice LPN about my struggles. Most of the time I’m fine, but irritable when I don’t mean to be. Then sometimes I can’t seem to do anything but sleep, despite having a million things to be doing. There are days where I absolutely hate myself. When I have to dig, and claw my way out of this dark space of self loathing, and it’s completely exhausting. Sometimes it feels like I’m walking through sludge, even if the sun is shining and there is nothing wrong. For me, it’s been a really physical experience. Exhausted. Crying. Irritable. Not being able to concentrate. Not being able to sleep. It hasn’t been like the commercials. I’m not a grey, sad cartoon with a flock of ravens around me. So if those don’t resonate with you (and if they do), and something I have described does resonate with you…please reach out. Talk to someone. Talk to a healthcare person, they are there for you, they are on your side. Talk to me if you want. If you have questions or fears. This is just the beginning of my journey, and there are more posts to come. I want to share my experience to heal, to help others heal and bring awareness. I hope you’ll join me!
About a month ago I finally decided to talk to someone about my mental health. I told a very nice LPN about my struggles. Most of the time I’m fine, but irritable when I don’t mean to be. Then sometimes I can’t seem to do anything but sleep, despite having a million things to be doing. There are days where I absolutely hate myself. When I have to dig, and claw my way out of this dark space of self loathing, and it’s completely exhausting. Sometimes it feels like I’m walking through sludge, even if the sun is shining and there is nothing wrong. For me, it’s been a really physical experience. Exhausted. Crying. Irritable. Not being able to concentrate. Not being able to sleep. It hasn’t been like the commercials. I’m not a grey, sad cartoon with a flock of ravens around me. So if those don’t resonate with you (and if they do), and something I have described does resonate with you…please reach out. Talk to someone. Talk to a healthcare person, they are there for you, they are on your side. Talk to me if you want. If you have questions or fears. This is just the beginning of my journey, and there are more posts to come. I want to share my experience to heal, to help others heal and bring awareness. I hope you’ll join me!
Depression has many symptoms and forms. It may not look how we’ve been led to believe 💕